What are you putting above your marriage? - New York News

What are you putting above your marriage?

Updated:
By Shutterstock.com. The most important thing in life is knowing the most important things in life.David F. By Shutterstock.com. The most important thing in life is knowing the most important things in life.David F.

By: Heather Hale, FamilyShare

Think back to when you started dating your spouse. When everything is new and exciting, we give the best of our time, energy, and talents into developing our relationships. Fast forward a few years - are you still giving your marriage your all? Chances are, between the wedding day and today, some things have started to slide. If you're looking to divorce-proof your marriage, you're going to have to give it all you've got, and that means putting your marriage first.

It's easy to put other priorities above our marriage, so easy, in fact, that we often don't realize we're doing it. However, if you find yourself bickering more often and seeing eye-to-eye less and less, you've probably let something come between you and your spouse. Here are some common concerns that push your marriage out of the forefront of your mind.

Career

We need to make money to survive, that's a given. However, when we put money before marriage, our relationships suffer. Putting in excessive hours at the office can leave your spouse feeling neglected and relegated to second place in your life. Before you commit to take on extra responsibilities, evaluate whether increased work pressure is worth the strain it will put on your marriage.

If you can't get away from the office more, look for ways to ease the burden at home. Vow not to take work problems out on your family, and allow yourself enough time to decompress after the day. Bringing work problems home adds to marital discord.

Family

Whether we're doting parents or devoted children, it's all too easy to let family obligations supersede our obligation to our spouse. Mothers are especially susceptible to forgetting their husband in favor of motherhood, a move which can leave Dad feeling alone and forgotten. Your spouse needs to come before the kids, and he deserves your time, attention, and affection. Remember that, after the kids are grown and gone, your spouse will still remain.

Also, beware of siding with family members over your spouse. As good as it might feel to vent about your spouse to your mother, sister or friend, it is never appropriate to denigrate your spouse to others. A huge part of being loyal to your husband is honoring his good name.

Friends

Can you say that your spouse is your best friend? She should be! Emotional affairs begin innocently. Confiding in a friend or spending large amounts of free time with a friend may seem harmless at first, but as you put friendship above your marriage, you are inviting in trouble. If you're having a hard time connecting with your spouse on a friendly level, look for new ways to spend time together. Take up a new couple hobby or resurrect a forgotten interest. As you find new ways to bond with your spouse, friends will fall into their proper supporting roles in your life.

Hobbies

Having an outlet to relax is a necessity for maintaining a balanced life. However, if your hobbies are putting a strain on your relationship, it's time to reconsider your priorities. You can usually spot a problem hobby if you find yourself getting into arguments with your spouse about your time spent away from the family. When a formerly good thing becomes a point of contention, that's probably a clue that you're putting a pastime ahead of your marriage. Have a sit-down discussion with your spouse about what is a reasonable amount of time each week to spend on personal hobbies. Be willing to compromise, and find ways to include your spouse or the entire family in your free time.

Your marriage is the most important relationship in your life. If you take the time to nourish it, you'll be blessed with companionship, friendship, and love your entire life. Creating a happier home and marriage always starts with an honest evaluation of your priorities. Look for little ways to show your spouse that she comes first today. It won't take long to start seeing the dividends from your affectionate attention. Here are some secrets for a happy marriage.


Original Post

Copyright 2013 Deseret Digital Media, Inc.

  • Local NewsLocal NewsMore>>

  • LL Cool J stays true to hip hop roots

    LL Cool J stays true to hip hop roots

    Friday, August 1 2014 10:38 PM EDT2014-08-02 02:38:22 GMT
    EXCLUSIVE -- LL Cool J grew and evolved from a hip hop artist out of Hollis, Queens, to a Hollywood TV and movie star. But he always stayed true to hip hop culture. We'd see him backstage at concerts just hanging out with us, so when I heard he was back in New York for the summer I had to find out why. I tracked him down to a Midtown Manhattan recording studio for this exclusive interview.
    EXCLUSIVE -- LL Cool J grew and evolved from a hip hop artist out of Hollis, Queens, to a Hollywood TV and movie star. But he always stayed true to hip hop culture. We'd see him backstage at concerts just hanging out with us, so when I heard he was back in New York for the summer I had to find out why. I tracked him down to a Midtown Manhattan recording studio for this exclusive interview.
  • Friday Night Live: August 1, 2014

    Friday Night Live: August 1, 2014

    Friday, August 1 2014 10:28 PM EDT2014-08-02 02:28:04 GMT
    This is Fox 5's Friday Night Live, a weekly celebration of the end of the work week. All summer long, the Fox 5 team brings you the latest in entertainment, nightlife, food, and music in our area. In this jam-packed episode: an exclusive interview with superstar LL Cool J, a helicopter tour over New York City, dishing on celebrity relationships, and sexier breakfast with Chef Mark Bailey.
    This is Fox 5's Friday Night Live, a weekly celebration of the end of the work week. All summer long, the Fox 5 team brings you the latest in entertainment, nightlife, food, and music in our area. In this jam-packed episode: an exclusive interview with superstar LL Cool J, a helicopter tour over New York City, dishing on celebrity relationships, and sexier breakfast with Chef Mark Bailey.
  • Central Park underwear run

    Central Park underwear run

    Friday, August 1 2014 10:16 PM EDT2014-08-02 02:16:48 GMT
    Raw athleticism streaked through Central Park Friday evening bared for a modest body of spectators. Two-hundred triathletes ran a skimpy 1.7-mile loop in their underwear to flesh out the opening festivities of New York City Triathlon weekend.Midriffs and tan lines rippled in the open air and a not-so-tighty finish saw the first male and the first female finishers undress the course in record time.
    Raw athleticism streaked through Central Park Friday evening bared for a modest body of spectators. Two-hundred triathletes ran a skimpy 1.7-mile loop in their underwear to flesh out the opening festivities of New York City Triathlon weekend.Midriffs and tan lines rippled in the open air and a not-so-tighty finish saw the first male and the first female finishers undress the course in record time.
Powered by WorldNow
Didn't find what you were looking for?
All content © Copyright 2000 - 2014 Fox Television Stations, Inc. and Worldnow. All Rights Reserved.
Privacy Policy | New Terms of Service What's new | Ad Choices