LeDuff talks with 'Smokey the Bear' about arson in Detroit - New York News

LeDuff talks with 'Smokey the Bear' about arson in Detroit

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Charlie LeDuff went "one-on-one" with Smokey the Bear, who has been "hanging around" the Motor City lately. Charlie LeDuff went "one-on-one" with Smokey the Bear, who has been "hanging around" the Motor City lately.
DETROIT (WJBK) -

Smokey the Bear, what are you doing hanging around on a billboard by I-94 in Detroit?

"Well, normally they set me up on the highway next to a forest, but hell, if the federal government wants to waste more of your money, I'll take it."

Smokey, I see that nine out of ten wildfires are caused by humans.  Did you know ten out of ten arsons are caused by humans?

"No I didn't know that.  That's usually the job of Andy the Arson Aardvark, but he's been laid off under the federal sequester."

Did you know that we had over 7,000 suspicious fires last year, but we don't have enough arson investigators to even get to a tenth of them?

"Well that doesn't make sense.  What dummy came up with that?  If you don't have arson investigators, you can't investigate arson, which means you can't catch arsonists, which means you have more arsons.  Doesn't take an aardvark to figure that out."

"I have a question for Smokey.  Are you going to stop all these wildfires in the city?" one man asked.

"I've been hanging around here for weeks.  I haven't seen one wildfire.  These are building fires, and the only people that can put those out is a real fire department."

Now here in Detroit we have fire trucks that don't pump water, ladders that don't extend and tires falling off of ambulances.  Smokey, we're going to need more than a shovel to dig our way out of this one.

"Yeah, I can see what you mean from up here.  It's going to take more than a cartoon and some empty words from the government to fix this thing.  I'll let them know up there in city hall."

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